after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
