So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
