Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
