I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
