Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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