3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize