You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
