Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
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