The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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