I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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