Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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