just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Randomize