She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
