Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
