I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
