the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize