Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
