so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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