Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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