My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
