doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
