I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
