she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I supernannyed him into submission
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
