Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I enjoy the company of your penis
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
