I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
Randomize
