I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
and she was petting her beer can
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize