Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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