Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize