I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
My vagina is officially offended.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
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