Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
My balls are so social today.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
