I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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