She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
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