Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
