WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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