it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Randomize