Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize