Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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