what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
