If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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