Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
