sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
