I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
