Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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