Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
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