you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
