I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
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