He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize
