This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I am available for nakedness
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
