the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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