Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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