I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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