Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
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