I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
so that wasnt chicken after all
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
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