That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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